to grieve

i was hoping to celebrate both my birthday and our first female president this weekend. i was looking forward to it, i was so sure of it already. then that didn’t happen. our confetti was left in bags, our celebratory cake was left uncut, and our celebratory beer unopened. my heart dropped to the floor tuesday and i’ve not been able to pick it back up. my heart breaks for myself, my family, my friends, and my community. i am trying to understand what is going on and i am a little afraid of what is going to happen. president elect sparked hate in many of our citizens towards women, mexicans, the disabled, the lgbtqia community, and immigrants. i am a few of those things, so yes, i take this election personal and i am allowed to grieve this loss. he can rebrand himself all he needs, but the damage has been done. we have children afraid they will be separated from their families, people believing that bullying will get you where you want to be even if their opinions offend your mere existence, and many of us who sit where i sit wondering 'do we not matter?' however, Hillary Clinton made me proud, she made me very fucking proud. she had a great run and we learned a lot from her and even from the loss. we will not succumb to the fear, insults, or threats. we will love, fight, hold on to hope, and never give up. after all, nothing lasts forever. we caught a glimpse of what could be and almost felt it at our fingertips and believe me, we will continue to try.

we WILL cut a celebratory cake one day. that i know.

talk soon,